This week we started our third week of school and I'm pleased to report that everything is now running smoothly. Michael is thriving in third grade (and finally being challenged in his spelling words!). Nicholas had a bit of a rough start but he's finally settling into kindergarten.
Lake Orion schools are smart. The first week of school they ease the kindergarten teachers and kids into the routine by having a staggered start. The first day only half of the students come to school, then the next day the other half attend. On the third day of school, which is Friday, everyone comes together for the first time.
Even so, going to kindergarten is a big adjustment. The first day Nicholas got off the bus with lots to say but the minute he walked in the house he ran right for the bathroom.
"Have to go peeee..." he shouted.
"Didn't you go at school today?" I asked.
"No. The teacher didn't ask if we had to go," replied Nicholas. In pre-K last year the teachers would line the kids up once or twice for a bathroom trip. Nicholas's kindergarten class has bathrooms right in the room so he can go whenever he wants. I don't think he realized this fact.
The next day of school the whole class was there - all 25 of them. He seemed a little overwhelmed when he got off the bus that afternoon.
"Michael, were you at that big, gigantic recess?" he exclaimed to his brother while we were walking home.
Michael was confused. "What big recess?" he asked.
"You know, the really big recess with all the kids!" Nicholas replied.
"Oh, I know what you're talking about," I said. "You're talking about the lunch recess right?" Today had been his first recess with all the kids.
"Yeah, that gigantic recess. I cried cause I missed Michael," Nicholas said matter-of-factly. Hmm, interesting.
"Well, did you find your friend Casey?" I asked. Casey was in the other kindergarten class and his mom and I had told our boys to look for each other on the playground. A familiar face often works wonders.
"No, I couldn't find him," said Nicholas.
The next week I received more reports about crying at the big, gigantic recess. On Monday, Nicholas did find Casey and they both cried together because they missed their moms. It became evident that I needed to do something to help Nicholas feel less overwhelmed, but what? I was in new territory because Michael had never had any troubles with kindergarten, well any that he told me about anyway.
So I turned to my wise sister-in-law who is a noon aide at my niece's elementary. She suggested that I find a small, flat rock that Nicholas could keep in his pocket. When he was missing me or feeling blue he could reach in his pocket, feel that rock, and be reminded of me.
And that's what I did. I found a small rock in the shape of a circle and drew a heart on one side and the words "I love you" on the back. Wednesday morning I showed Nicholas the rock and told him what it was for. As I put it in his pocket I told him to reach in and feel it when he felt like he needed some Mama love. I couldn't wait for him to get home that day so I could see if it worked.
It did. That afternoon Nicholas ran off the bus and gave me a great big hug. "Mom," he said excitedly, "at recess I started crying a little and then I remembered about the rock and it made me stop crying!"
"I'm so glad," I said as I gave him a kiss on the head.
The next afternoon he told me that he cried a little in class because he lost the rock at recess. "Can you make me another one?" he added. I promised that I would.
However, as we were about to go out the door on Friday morning I realized that I hadn't made a new one. I didn't have time to go find a rock so I quickly wrote "I love you" on a yellow piece of paper and put it in Nicholas's pocket.
When Nicholas got off the bus that afternoon he was a veritable chatterbox about school. As he was talking, he reached in his pocket.
"Here, Mom," he said handing me the yellow piece of paper that I had given him earlier. "I don't need this anymore. I didn't cry today at recess. Casey and I played instead."
Hurray!!! Problem solved! I felt a surge of joy reach my face and spread my mouth into a smile. I looked down at Nicholas. He was smiling and laughing as he skipped down the road with his brother and friend. My kindergartener had arrived!!
Out of the mouths of babes: Yesterday Nicholas learned about the Pledge of Allegiance. They learned all about the different words in the Pledge ( pledge, allegiance, indivisible, liberty, justice, and Republic) and what each word meant. Nicholas had his own description for the word Republic, however. "Mom, I thought they were talking about the Star Wars Republic Gunship," he reported. Oh, the things you learn by having an older brother :)
About Me
- Jennifer
- I'm a wife of 19 years to Jeff and mother to two teens, Michael 18, and Tracy 15. The cats, Hannah and Leia,are female so I have a little female energy in the house besides me! In my previous life BK (before kids) I was a technical writer, poet, and essayist. Now I'm a write-at-home mom who tries to find the balance between writing, doing for kids, doing for hubbie, doing for the house, and doing for myself.
Tuesday, September 20, 2011
Friday, September 9, 2011
A Letter To My Kindergartener
Dear Nicholas:
This week you started Kindergarten! Yippee!! Hooray!! Hallelujah!! I'm very proud of you because you did it without tears or temper tantrums. I knew you would, though, because you're a big boy and also because you're ready.
At Kindergarten orientation on Tuesday you met some of the kids in your class. Ella you already knew from Pre-K. I think she'll be a big help to you because she's a familiar face. I could already see how it's going to be with you two as you made silly faces at each other and sat next to each other on the little bus ride.
We saw another familiar face, and that is your teacher, Mrs. N, the same teacher Michael had for kindergarten. I was so relieved when we got the letter in the mail informing us that she was going to be your teacher. I know it will make your kindergarten experience that much easier.
Of course, in true Nicholas fashion you didn't want to participate in the Orientation activities and clung to me the whole time.
"You do it," you exclaimed when I told you it was time to put your school supplies in the bins Mrs. N had placed throughout the room. Likewise you didn't want to do the craft that Mrs. N had arranged. But, you did them anyway. It was frustrating to me to have you act that way but I knew that this was just your way of expressing your nervousness and fear about starting kindergarten. Still, I was feeling a bit of trepidation - what if you were like this in class? I know how stubborn you can be.
At home that afternoon we had so much fun together - our little last hurrah of mommy and Nicholas time. We built towers with rectangular blocks and used letter blocks to make words for you to read (mad, sad, and, mat, fat, pat). Then we used Jenga blocks as dominoes. You estimated that we used 100 blocks to make our line, while I estimated 50. After counting them all we discovered that, at 84 blocks, your estimation was the closest! You were so happy that you beat me! Later on we made applesauce together - I peeled and you used the apple slicer to make chunks. "Let me do it," you said confidently.
As we worked together I realized all that we had accomplished that afternoon - reading, spelling, counting, estimating - all skills that you will be working on in kindergarten. And you did them in such a way that you probably didn't view it as work. Yep, no doubt about it - you are ready for kindergarten. But am I ready to let you go?
The truth of the matter is that I am. Your entry into the elementary journey is a lot different than Michael's was and I feel secure in the knowledge that you will be safe and in a place you will thrive. When Michael began kindergarten everything was new to us. We were new to the school, we didn't know his teacher, and he didn't know any of his classmates. Michael didn't have a friend to sit with on the bus either, or a big brother to walk him to his classroom, like you do.
Michael was a lot more innocent at five than you are, partly because you have the experience of being around your older brother and his friends and partly because you are more worldly than he is. When Michael was your age we didn't know about Phineas and Ferb or Spongebob - we still watched Sesame Street and Mickey Mouse Clubhouse.
Waking you up from a deep sleep at 7:00 a.m. on your first day of school was hard - you need all the sleep you can get to make it through the day and I hated to wake you. You were so tired that morning that I took pity on you and helped you get dressed when you asked. I even had to feed you breakfast to ensure you would have something in your tummy.
You perked right up, though, when we left for the bus stop and you saw your friend Jack from across the street walking with his parents. You ran right up to him, leaving me in the dust.
When the bus came, you gave me a quick hug and kiss, then boarded the bus with your peers. I waved to your smiling little bespectacled face as the bus pulled away, and then you were off. Despite my feelings of joy at this moment because you FINALLY made it to kindergarten, I felt myself tearing up. After all, you are my youngest child, my baby (although you haven't been a baby for years), and we are entering a whole new chapter of our lives. We are done with the nurturing preschool years and are entering the self-sufficient elementary years.
I feel that the preschool years were just long enough - we got to spend a lot of quality time together. But I know from experience now that the elementary years race on by - in just three short years I'll be putting Michael on the bus to middle school and you'll be the one in 3rd grade! So I will do everything in my power to savor every moment of elementary school.
I'm looking forward to seeing you grow and expand this year as I know you will. In no time you'll be telling me stories about what you and your best buddies do at recess, and I'll be watching as you begin to read and write with confidence.
Nicholas, I hope you know that whatever chapter of life you're in I will be standing in it with tears of joy and love because I'm so proud to be your mom!
This week you started Kindergarten! Yippee!! Hooray!! Hallelujah!! I'm very proud of you because you did it without tears or temper tantrums. I knew you would, though, because you're a big boy and also because you're ready.
At Kindergarten orientation on Tuesday you met some of the kids in your class. Ella you already knew from Pre-K. I think she'll be a big help to you because she's a familiar face. I could already see how it's going to be with you two as you made silly faces at each other and sat next to each other on the little bus ride.
We saw another familiar face, and that is your teacher, Mrs. N, the same teacher Michael had for kindergarten. I was so relieved when we got the letter in the mail informing us that she was going to be your teacher. I know it will make your kindergarten experience that much easier.
Of course, in true Nicholas fashion you didn't want to participate in the Orientation activities and clung to me the whole time.
"You do it," you exclaimed when I told you it was time to put your school supplies in the bins Mrs. N had placed throughout the room. Likewise you didn't want to do the craft that Mrs. N had arranged. But, you did them anyway. It was frustrating to me to have you act that way but I knew that this was just your way of expressing your nervousness and fear about starting kindergarten. Still, I was feeling a bit of trepidation - what if you were like this in class? I know how stubborn you can be.At home that afternoon we had so much fun together - our little last hurrah of mommy and Nicholas time. We built towers with rectangular blocks and used letter blocks to make words for you to read (mad, sad, and, mat, fat, pat). Then we used Jenga blocks as dominoes. You estimated that we used 100 blocks to make our line, while I estimated 50. After counting them all we discovered that, at 84 blocks, your estimation was the closest! You were so happy that you beat me! Later on we made applesauce together - I peeled and you used the apple slicer to make chunks. "Let me do it," you said confidently.
As we worked together I realized all that we had accomplished that afternoon - reading, spelling, counting, estimating - all skills that you will be working on in kindergarten. And you did them in such a way that you probably didn't view it as work. Yep, no doubt about it - you are ready for kindergarten. But am I ready to let you go?
The truth of the matter is that I am. Your entry into the elementary journey is a lot different than Michael's was and I feel secure in the knowledge that you will be safe and in a place you will thrive. When Michael began kindergarten everything was new to us. We were new to the school, we didn't know his teacher, and he didn't know any of his classmates. Michael didn't have a friend to sit with on the bus either, or a big brother to walk him to his classroom, like you do.
Michael was a lot more innocent at five than you are, partly because you have the experience of being around your older brother and his friends and partly because you are more worldly than he is. When Michael was your age we didn't know about Phineas and Ferb or Spongebob - we still watched Sesame Street and Mickey Mouse Clubhouse.
Waking you up from a deep sleep at 7:00 a.m. on your first day of school was hard - you need all the sleep you can get to make it through the day and I hated to wake you. You were so tired that morning that I took pity on you and helped you get dressed when you asked. I even had to feed you breakfast to ensure you would have something in your tummy.
You perked right up, though, when we left for the bus stop and you saw your friend Jack from across the street walking with his parents. You ran right up to him, leaving me in the dust.When the bus came, you gave me a quick hug and kiss, then boarded the bus with your peers. I waved to your smiling little bespectacled face as the bus pulled away, and then you were off. Despite my feelings of joy at this moment because you FINALLY made it to kindergarten, I felt myself tearing up. After all, you are my youngest child, my baby (although you haven't been a baby for years), and we are entering a whole new chapter of our lives. We are done with the nurturing preschool years and are entering the self-sufficient elementary years.
I feel that the preschool years were just long enough - we got to spend a lot of quality time together. But I know from experience now that the elementary years race on by - in just three short years I'll be putting Michael on the bus to middle school and you'll be the one in 3rd grade! So I will do everything in my power to savor every moment of elementary school.
I'm looking forward to seeing you grow and expand this year as I know you will. In no time you'll be telling me stories about what you and your best buddies do at recess, and I'll be watching as you begin to read and write with confidence.
Nicholas, I hope you know that whatever chapter of life you're in I will be standing in it with tears of joy and love because I'm so proud to be your mom!
Monday, June 6, 2011
The Countdown
It's June 5th and I'm starting a countdown to summer: 10 more wake-up calls in the morning, 8 more lunches I have to make for Michael, 6 more trips to Pre-K and back. In 4 days, Nicholas will "graduate" from Pre-K and become a kindergartener. In 10 days, Michael will be a 3rd grader. This means that I only have 15 more hours of precious free time and then summer vacation will be upon us.
This is the end of an era for me as next year both boys will be in school all day long. I have to admit I get a bit teary every time I think about it. It's not just the fact that for the first time in 8 years my life won't exclusively revolve around my kids and I can start to pursue something that is just my own (which is a little scary). It's that my youngest is growing up and the preschool years are over. It's a bittersweet feeling. I've been both waiting for and dreading this day.
The preschool years - what a busy time! While I'm happy to put potty training, naps, and hour-long tantrums behind me, there are many things I look back fondly upon: leisurely picnics in the front yard, playing baseball all afternoon, watching the Imagination Movers, taking "nature hikes" at 8:00 a.m., and going "garage-sale-ing" for treasures.
I admit it will be nice to be able to get the laundry completely done without having to leave it half folded because I ran out of time before Pre-K pickup at 11:30 a.m. However, I will no longer be able to use Nicholas as my excuse if the house is still a wreck at 3:30 p.m. I imagine that at first I'll be a little lonely without my little entertainer to keep me company. I do, however, have 8 years of writing backlogged in my imagination to attend to.
Regardless of my feelings, Nicholas no longer thinks that he can be home schooled and accepts that he is going to Kindergarten next year. In fact, I think he's a little excited. He talks about who will be in his class and is curious about how the bus ride to school will work. He's also entered the world of pre-reading: sounding words out on his own and matching words with pictures. My heart is full because it is evident that we made the right decision to put him into Pre-K this year - he's confident, self-assured, and so much more mature (well, as mature as you can be when you're 5!).
The fact that Michael will be entering 3rd grade seems impossible to me. I remember 3rd grade, that time when kids begin to really mature. I've been told that the work load increases dramatically. Next year Michael will be learning cursive writing, more complicated multiplication and division, and he will be taking the standardized MEAP tests. Michael will handle that fine as he's a very bright boy. It's the behaviors that come with the upper elementary grades that often concern me. Michael has managed to get through grades K-2 as if he's encased in a bubble - he still retains that innocent quality that I was worried would disappear when he entered grade school. Either he just lets teasing and taunts roll off his back or no one messes with him. In this age of bullies it's truly remarkable. I hope the bubble remains for a long time!
I know I can't keep my boys young forever but sometimes I just want to freeze time. Nicholas still requires lots of hugs and kisses and Michael is not yet embarrassed of the love I shower on hm. This will all change someday - after all, there's one constant in this world and that is change. So I will continue to enjoy all the moments I have with them and savor this summer break, knowing that while it might be the end of one phase of our lives, it's also the beginning of another.
This is the end of an era for me as next year both boys will be in school all day long. I have to admit I get a bit teary every time I think about it. It's not just the fact that for the first time in 8 years my life won't exclusively revolve around my kids and I can start to pursue something that is just my own (which is a little scary). It's that my youngest is growing up and the preschool years are over. It's a bittersweet feeling. I've been both waiting for and dreading this day.
The preschool years - what a busy time! While I'm happy to put potty training, naps, and hour-long tantrums behind me, there are many things I look back fondly upon: leisurely picnics in the front yard, playing baseball all afternoon, watching the Imagination Movers, taking "nature hikes" at 8:00 a.m., and going "garage-sale-ing" for treasures.
I admit it will be nice to be able to get the laundry completely done without having to leave it half folded because I ran out of time before Pre-K pickup at 11:30 a.m. However, I will no longer be able to use Nicholas as my excuse if the house is still a wreck at 3:30 p.m. I imagine that at first I'll be a little lonely without my little entertainer to keep me company. I do, however, have 8 years of writing backlogged in my imagination to attend to.
Regardless of my feelings, Nicholas no longer thinks that he can be home schooled and accepts that he is going to Kindergarten next year. In fact, I think he's a little excited. He talks about who will be in his class and is curious about how the bus ride to school will work. He's also entered the world of pre-reading: sounding words out on his own and matching words with pictures. My heart is full because it is evident that we made the right decision to put him into Pre-K this year - he's confident, self-assured, and so much more mature (well, as mature as you can be when you're 5!).
The fact that Michael will be entering 3rd grade seems impossible to me. I remember 3rd grade, that time when kids begin to really mature. I've been told that the work load increases dramatically. Next year Michael will be learning cursive writing, more complicated multiplication and division, and he will be taking the standardized MEAP tests. Michael will handle that fine as he's a very bright boy. It's the behaviors that come with the upper elementary grades that often concern me. Michael has managed to get through grades K-2 as if he's encased in a bubble - he still retains that innocent quality that I was worried would disappear when he entered grade school. Either he just lets teasing and taunts roll off his back or no one messes with him. In this age of bullies it's truly remarkable. I hope the bubble remains for a long time!
I know I can't keep my boys young forever but sometimes I just want to freeze time. Nicholas still requires lots of hugs and kisses and Michael is not yet embarrassed of the love I shower on hm. This will all change someday - after all, there's one constant in this world and that is change. So I will continue to enjoy all the moments I have with them and savor this summer break, knowing that while it might be the end of one phase of our lives, it's also the beginning of another.
Friday, April 29, 2011
I Never Knew My Mom Was a Trapeze Artist
When exactly does a woman become a mother? A) The minute her first child is born? B) When she takes him home from the hospital? C) When she experiences the sleep-deprived reality that comes from nursing every 2 hours?
If you would have asked me this question 8 years ago I would have gone with answer A. However, 8 years and two children later I realize that becoming a mother takes more than just birthing a child between your legs and calling yourself a mom.
Mothers are not born with our children, they are made. There is no instruction booklet on how to be a mom. We learn through experience, trial by fire, and sometimes with disastrous results. We learn that when you change your infant son's diaper you'd better cover him up quickly or you WILL get peed on. We learn that when your child is not feeling good and says that he thinks he has to throw up, you have a 5-second window to get him to the toilet before he does so.
Even so, I think it takes more than just experience to be successful at this mothering thing. It takes passion and energy and commitment. And balance.
My mom is someone whose experience and opinion I trust and value. She has shown me how to be a good mother through her mothering of me and my brother. She wasn't a helicopter mom or a soccer mom or a stay-at-home mom like June Cleaver. She was a do-it-all mom who worked part-time but was always home when we came home from school. She was a mom who earned her Master's Degree while working and taking care of us. She was a mom who had interests and hobbies outside of her kids. I know now how important that is: it's a key component to keeping your sanity as a mom. It showed me that while I was an important part of her life I was not the only part. My mom showed me that to be a mom you need to have balance.
This b
This mothering thing we do is a tightrope act that involves balancing our needs with our children's needs. To be really successful at it we need to be sure of our footing and who we are or we risk falling and losing ourselves in the daily barrage of tasks.
To all you moms out there who have found your balance, I salute you. To all you moms out there like me who haven't found it yet, I say keep searching. Start small. Pledge with me to do at least one thing for yourself every day that will bring you into balance at that moment: take a walk after dinner, read a magazine, take a bath, eat a whole cookie (not one that you have to share with the kids), breathe deeply for 5 minutes. Then, as you get braver, take more time for yourself: go for long walks in the woods, read a book, get a massage, go see a movie with friends or by yourself, go out to dinner with friends. You see where I'm going here.
I understand that trying to incorporate a little time for ourselves may at first prompt some strange reactions from our spouses and children ("Mom wants to do what and without us? Boo hoo!!") And we may feel that we're abandoning them. However, my belief is that the more we do for ourselves the easier it will be to work "Mom's Time" into our lives and pretty soon our balancing act will be a normal part of our routine.
Have a happy Mother's Day! Be good to yourselves!!!
If you like this blog or blog about mothering yourself, check out the About.com's Mother's Day Blog Carnival!
If you would have asked me this question 8 years ago I would have gone with answer A. However, 8 years and two children later I realize that becoming a mother takes more than just birthing a child between your legs and calling yourself a mom.
Mothers are not born with our children, they are made. There is no instruction booklet on how to be a mom. We learn through experience, trial by fire, and sometimes with disastrous results. We learn that when you change your infant son's diaper you'd better cover him up quickly or you WILL get peed on. We learn that when your child is not feeling good and says that he thinks he has to throw up, you have a 5-second window to get him to the toilet before he does so.
Even so, I think it takes more than just experience to be successful at this mothering thing. It takes passion and energy and commitment. And balance.
My mom is someone whose experience and opinion I trust and value. She has shown me how to be a good mother through her mothering of me and my brother. She wasn't a helicopter mom or a soccer mom or a stay-at-home mom like June Cleaver. She was a do-it-all mom who worked part-time but was always home when we came home from school. She was a mom who earned her Master's Degree while working and taking care of us. She was a mom who had interests and hobbies outside of her kids. I know now how important that is: it's a key component to keeping your sanity as a mom. It showed me that while I was an important part of her life I was not the only part. My mom showed me that to be a mom you need to have balance.
This b
This mothering thing we do is a tightrope act that involves balancing our needs with our children's needs. To be really successful at it we need to be sure of our footing and who we are or we risk falling and losing ourselves in the daily barrage of tasks.
To all you moms out there who have found your balance, I salute you. To all you moms out there like me who haven't found it yet, I say keep searching. Start small. Pledge with me to do at least one thing for yourself every day that will bring you into balance at that moment: take a walk after dinner, read a magazine, take a bath, eat a whole cookie (not one that you have to share with the kids), breathe deeply for 5 minutes. Then, as you get braver, take more time for yourself: go for long walks in the woods, read a book, get a massage, go see a movie with friends or by yourself, go out to dinner with friends. You see where I'm going here.
I understand that trying to incorporate a little time for ourselves may at first prompt some strange reactions from our spouses and children ("Mom wants to do what and without us? Boo hoo!!") And we may feel that we're abandoning them. However, my belief is that the more we do for ourselves the easier it will be to work "Mom's Time" into our lives and pretty soon our balancing act will be a normal part of our routine.
Have a happy Mother's Day! Be good to yourselves!!!
If you like this blog or blog about mothering yourself, check out the About.com's Mother's Day Blog Carnival!
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